Staying Present in the Moment: A Holiday Gift for Yourself Stop! What are you doing right now? Is your mind completely focused on this article or are you thinking of the million tasks you need to do to make your holiday season brighter and merrier than ever? With today’s world of rush-rush and faster-faster, it is no wonder that our minds are thinking of many things at once. While it may seem inconceivable to truly remain in the moment, the truth is that staying present is the best gift you can give yourself during this busy holiday season. Focusing on the now rather than the past or present can help you deeply experience the joy of this holiday season. While it is easy to focus on the future or the past, I personally practice staying in the present throughout the year. It is truly amazing how much time I spend somewhere other than here--in the now. I now recognize quickly that when I am anxious, I am in the future rather than the present. When I am angry, I'm in the past. Yes, the past may be ten minutes ago. The future could be two hours from now. Either way, worrying or being angry is not going to improve my disposition or health, so why would I want to remain there? If, in the moment, I am able to consciously choose how I want to think (positively) and react (proactively), then I can make a positive difference or better handle situations and people. Think of a recent situation that caused you to be anxious. Maybe you're anxious now. Consider for a moment what you could do right now to relieve some of your anxiety. If you can do something--do it! If you can't do anything about the situation, circumstance, or person you're anxious about, you can intentionally let it go until you can act, reflect, or change your situation. Forget your knee jerk (habitual) response of getting worried. Yes, your anxious or angry response is habit. Consider breaking the habit to reduce or get rid of your negative emotions. A great place to start to change these habits is to pay attention to the conversations you have in your head. Listen to the chatter that others can't hear going on in your mind, but you can. Think about the last time you got anxious. I'll bet if you tuned in to the running dialogue in your head, you would have heard fear-based comments. Those comments start flying around in my head whenever I begin to get overwhelmed with work. If I let you listen in, you'd hear comments like, "Kate, you'll never get this all done. There's no way. You're going to end up disappointing your clients, participants, and meeting planner. Of course, then you'll probably be so caught up in all this, you'll be cranky with the kids." You get the idea. I've learned that I have to stop that negative rambling or I end up in a nervous twit in thirty seconds. It's almost a guarantee that if you're worried, your mind is in the future and what you're saying to yourself is not supportive, positive, or proactive. If you're angry, you're rehashing a situation, conversation, or comment and feeling victimized or helpless about it. Maybe you're wanting to replay it or redo it--either way, you're in the past. Come back to the present and decide what you can do and what you want to say to yourself so you do not feel like a victim or someone who is out of control. It is important to learn from the past, and plan for the future. However, it's unproductive to stay out of the present for too long. So, this holiday season, think about an important gift you can give yourself: the present of being truly present. excerpt from Progress Not Perfection: Your Journey Matters by Kate Larsen (Expert Publishing Inc.: 2007 ) ----- Have you ordered your copy of Progress Not Perfection yet? If you enjoy the messages conveyed each month in this ezine, you’ll love the book. Go to http://www.katelarsen.com/products.html to order a copy for yourself and a friend. If you want me to sign it to you or someone else, put a note in your order and I’ll be happy to take care of it. Kate Larsen, PCC http://www.katelarsen.com http://www.wellcoaches.com/kate.larsen Phone: 952-943-1430 Author of Progress Not Perfection: Your Journey Matters Executive coach for The Ken Blanchard Companies Faculty, advisor, mentor and executive coach for Wellcoaches Corp.